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Rules of the Mess

How to Make a Point of Order

  1. Stand and address the President (Madam Vice if they have been given control of the mess).
  2. State, “Madam President, (your rank and name), I have a point of order.
  3. Wait to be recognized by the President (or Vice).
  4. When recognized, in a polite and forthright manner, state your Point of order and the action
    you desire.

    For example, “Sgt. Snuffy’s cummerbund is upside down causing embarrassment
    to the mess. Please send Sgt. Snuffy to The Grog.


  5. After stating your point of order, be seated.

The following is a list of rules under which the mess will be conducted.

They are designed to conform to tradition and promote levity.
Violators of these rules are subject to the raft and
mischievousness of the president.
All assigned penalties will be carried out before the membership.

  1. Thou shalt arrive within 10 minutes of the appointed hour.
  2. Thou shalt make every effort to meet all guests.
  3. Thou shalt move to the mess when thee hear the chimes and remain standing until seated by the President.
  4. Thou shalt not bring cocktails or lighted smoking material in the mess.
  5. Thou shalt not leave the mess whilst convened. Military protocol overrides all calls of nature.
  6. Thou shalt participate in all toasts unless thyself or thy group is Honored with a toast.
  7. Thou shalt ensure that thy glass is always charged while toasting.
  8. Thou shalt keep toasts and comments within the limits of good taste and mutual respect.
    Degrading or insulting remarks will be frowned upon by the membership. However, good natured needling is ENCOURAGED.
  9. Thou shalt not murder the Queen’s English.
  10. Thou shalt not open the hangar doors.
  11. Thou shalt always use proper toasting procedure.
  12. Thou shalt fall into disrepute with thy peers if the pleats of thy cummerbund are not properly faced.
  13. Thou shalt also be painfully regarded if thy clip-on bow tie rides at an obvious list. Thou shalt be forgiven, however,
    if thee also ride at a comparable list.
  14. Thou shalt consume thy meal in a manner becoming gentlepersons.
  15. Thou shalt not laugh at ridiculously funny comments unless the President fi rst shows approval by laughing.
  16. Thou shalt express thy approval by tapping the spoon on the table.
  17. Clapping of hands will not be tolerated.

Thou shalt not question the decision of the President

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Page was added on:  
22 September 2007

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Revised: 10/21/09.